How to give yourself a little more time at dinner time...

A cry of working moms everywhere is I wish I had a little more time with my children! But the reality is by the time you get off work, pick them up from daycare, cook dinner, get the family settled down to eat dinner, clean up dinner its 6:30/7:00 and almost bedtime.

Mom's I hear you. Nothing is more discouraging then being close to your kids, but not being engaged with them, especially after being at work all day, away from them.

One thing that has helped me considerably is meal planning. When I first heard the concept of meal planning, I thought anyone who does that must be crazy.  I barely have time to grocery shop for a few meals, much less plan for an entire week. I don't have that much time! But I've discovered the exact opposite has happened.  Meal planning has given me more time. I feel less rushed, and I no longer have to solve the great big question, "What's for Dinner?!?" I already know the answer! And knowing this answer has personally reduced my stress. And I've found when I'm less stressed it makes it easier to take the time to be with my kids.

In the simplest form, Meal Planning is scheduling what you will eat throughout the week, so you don't have to come home and figure it out on the fly.  What meat do I have in the freezer that I can easily defrost? Do I have a box of rice? What veggies go with that? Meal planning answers all of those questions ahead of time, so dinner preparation becomes less stressful.

Here is my latest Meal Planning Worksheet and a link to this worksheet, Meal Planning Worksheet

If this particular worksheet doesn't work for you, you can google Meal Planning or search for it on pinterest and find other ideas.  I want you to start meal planning so your life becomes simpler, less chaotic, I could careless what form you use! I've learned there are so few things that I can control in my life or with my children, but this area of dinner time, I can control--so I should, it ultimately makes my life easier!

This doesn't mean I don't deviate from the plan, sometimes I switch nights, if I don't feel like having what I originally planned. Since, I already have all the ingredients, the switch doesn't cause chaos to my dinner time prep.

Ways to make more from less.

1. Find meals that use the same protein, so you don't have to prep two nights in a row.  For example, brown your ground beef and use it one night for spaghetti and the next night for tacos (heat it up and just add seasoning). I frequently buy a rotisserie chicken from Costco and we have it one night for dinner and then the next night I make chicken fajitas, and after using it for two meals, I cut up the leftover chicken and make chicken noodle soup. 
2. Make extras to use later.  On the weekends when I make pancakes, I make a double batch so the leftovers can be frozen and used throughout the week.  When I make chili, I make a double batch and freeze half of it so we can thaw it and reheat on a week night when we have other things going on.
3. Split 9" x 13" recipes to two 8" x 8". It's not exactly the same, but close enough. (This works great for smaller families) I do this with chicken enchiladas and lasagna. I make two 8" x 8" pans and freeze one and cook the other.  This makes for another way to have a "quick" meal when my evenings are busy.  (I went to the thrift store and purchased some 8" x 8" pans. Why would I want to pay full retail for a glass pan?!?)

Try it! Start somewhere, plan three meals a week.  Before you know it, you'll want to plan every night because it makes the question, "What's for Dinner?" so easy to answer! And when you know that answer before you get home from work, things just get easier.

One thing that I've started doing with my 4-year old is letting her pick an activity to do at the kitchen table when I'm preparing dinner. This keeps her from watching TV and keeps her close to me. Having her close makes it easier for me to interact with her. I comment on what she's doing and ask her questions about her day. This also allows me to join in while I'm waiting for the water to boil or for the oven to preheat. 

Here are a few things we do for activity time:
Play-Doh
Water Colors
Markers
Stickers
Toothpicks and Marshmellow Building
Pipecleaners
Legos on the kitchen floor

Pretty much anything that can keep her in the room with me, even if its a little messy--the return is worth it!

And my 8-month old, plays on a blanket with a few toys on the kitchen floor. I talk to her as I cook or pause and make a silly face at her to get her to laugh, just something every now and then so she knows I see her.

And remember, you aren't alone! There are moms all over feeling exactly like you do. Struggling to get a decent meal on the table, wanting to spend more time with their kids and somewhere in the midst of it all laundry, dishes, and just 5 minutes on a couch!

Try the meal planning, I really think it will help you immensely create more time for you to spend with your kids.

Father's Day without a Father...

Today my heart is heavy. It's Father's Day. Everywhere you look people are posting pictures of their dads or their children with their dads. But so many of you don't have dads. And some of you don't have a dad, because they made a choice or your mom made a choice that left you beautiful one without a daddy.

I am so sorry.

Today my heart is heavy for you. You, the one that is flipping through social media, trying to keep it together for your sake or even your children's sake. I do not understand, I have not been in your shoes, but today in the midst of all the happiness, I wanted you to know God sees you, right there in the midst of your hurt, loneliness, and feeling like your missing something.

There really aren't any words that I can't offer that will make the ache in your heart any less.

But I wanted you to know you are not alone. God wanted me to write this to you today. I couldn't get you out of my mind, He wanted me to tell you He sees you and He will help you today and everyday. He longs to be the one you tell your stories to, the good ones and the bad ones. Tonight when you lay your head on your pillow, think of laying your head on Papa God's lap. Maybe he's singing to you, maybe he's playing with your hair, may you go to bed tonight knowing you are loved so much. I pray it goes from your head into the depths of your heart, beautiful one.

I'm praying for you today.

Busted by my 4 year old!

We were on our way to meet my parents. We were meeting up in Wisconsin for a waterpark rendezvous. We were suppose to leave at 8, it was 8:45 and no one had breakfast. Thankfully, there is a McDonald's on my way to the freeway!

I placed our order, hotcakes and a number #2 with a large diet dr. pepper. (up it goes on the screen).
Speaker: If everything is correct on the screen, pull forward.
Me: It's not correct, I would like a diet dr. pepper.
(She add a 2nd dr. pepper)
Me: That's not right, i would like a diet dr. pepper, not a dr. pepper.
Speaker: It is right, pay at the next window.
Me: The screen isn't correct, I would like a diet dr. pepper, you have dr. pepper.
Speaker: Do you want one dr. pepper or two.
Me: I'll take two, that's fine, but I would like them to be DIET DR. PEPPER.
(Finally, the screen changes from Dr. Pepper to Diet Dr. Pepper)

As we pull away from the speaker to the first window a voice behind me says, "Mommy, that wasn't kind. You need to be nice. That wasn't very respectful."

<crickets>

She was right! I was late, frustrated, impatient, unkind, and disrespectful. I had 5 seconds to decide what lesson I was going to teach my daughter. I could justify my actions. After all, Diet Dr. Pepper does sound different than Dr. Pepper, she obviously wasn't listening to my order. I do speak loudly and clearly. But, I decided to just admit the obvious. I wasn't kind. I wasn't nice. I wasn't respectful.

It's difficult to admit when you are wrong, and its even harder when your child points out how wrong you really were...

Before we got to the first window, I turned around and said, "Abigail, you are right. Mommy wasn't being kind. I'm sorry for being disrespectful. I shouldn't have talked to her like that."

Abigail, "That's okay, I forgive you."

I took a deep breath, pulled up to the next window where we got our hotcakes, #2, and two large Diet Dr. Pepper's, and we were on our way.

I am so thankful my daughter will stand up for what is right, even if that means telling me I'm wrong. I pray I will never be above correction and that she will always speak up for those being treated unkindly.

What are you teaching your children? Do you foster an environment where your children feel safe pointing out the error of your ways? Or are you too prideful? I don't think I have felt more ashamed of my behavior than I did in that moment when my 4 year old, told me how wrong I was--HUMBLING!